Thursday, January 22, 2015

Humor and Satire

“Grab the ring before she wakes up , Josh.”
“No I’m not going to pry it from her fingers you freak, she’s going to die soon why can’t you just wait?”
“I need the money now.  What’s her use for it?”
“Good point.”
“ Where’s Rob that dingus. He’s always late.”
“Ever since he got out of the slammer he’s been all f*$#ed up.”
“ Well he needs to get his life together and stop carrying a jack daniels bottle around with him everywhere he goes, I’m tired of the dirty looks in public.”
“Oh leave him alone Jenny you’re not that much better, you’re trying to steal your grandmothers wedding ring so you can buy a flat screen for the super bowl.”
“ HEY IT’S NECESSARY OKAY?”
“ Ya, tell that to Nana when she wakes up and he ring is gone.”
(jennie pretends to wimper)
“She would’ve wanted it this way.”
(Rob stumbles into the house, randomly through the window.)
“ What the hell are you doing?”
“ uh, I don’t know, the door was locked.”
“You need to chill with the drinking you idiot, now be quiet you’re gonna wake up Nana.”
“Did you grab the ring yet?”
“I’m working on it dingus, she’s been in and out of sleep all night, that damn rocking chair keeps creaking.”
All of sudden the grandmother jumps up in a panic, in her hand she’s holding a small hand gun, the three grandchildren hit the ground. 
“Nana what are you doing!!”
“WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE? GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!”
“Nana calm down it’s just us!”
“No no no, someone was trying to steal my ring, I heard ya!”
“ Nana go back to sleep, you’re having another fit.”

The grandmother just drops to the ground and fell asleep, the grandchildren grab her ring and joyously run out of house bragging about how rich they will soon be.  They finally arrive at the pawn shop, the pawnbroker has incredible news to share with the three siblings, the ring is fake, and is worth no more than 25$.  While the grandchildren weren’t paying attention, their grandmother switched out the ring with a fake and hid the real one.  They all looked at each other in disbelief and never tried to steal from their grandmother again. 

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